A Life-Changing Childhood Experience

by Doreen Imper

I'd like to begin by thanking my dear friend and fellow traveler Katharina, for her tireless efforts in bringing forth information about the abduction experience and for giving us the opportunity to share our thoughts, insights, and experiences with others. Through this process much will be gained and perhaps together we will discover that this great mystery may not be such a mystery after all.

My name is Doreen Imper. I've been married now for 12 years and together we are raising our two young children ages 5 and 7 1/2. I've been employed by the same agency for the past 22 years and by all accounts my life is very conventional. I've been an abductee for as long as I can remember and have reached this point with basically the same types of experiences as has been recounted before. So rather than go into previously established information, I'd like to just share a very early and fully conscious experience I had when I was five years old.

My family and I lived in Mt. View, California, where my father was employed at NASA as an aeronautical engineer. My mother was a homemaker working hard raising me and my brother who was seven years old at the time.

One night I was awakened by a hum and thumping sound. On opening my eyes I saw very bright balls of light in the hall and entrance to my bedroom. The light was so bright that there were no shadows and my surroundings were almost bleached white. Remarkably, my eyes adjusted to it instantaneously. As the balls of light disappeared, a loud electrical popping sound was heard (like the sound of a light exploding), and three dark gray figures appeared in their place. I referred to these entities as the 'shadow people' (i.e., Grey beings). One Grey stood out as the leader and has remained an integral part of these experiences.

I was then taken on board a craft and was immediately escorted and placed into a chamber where my physical body was subjected to a vibration that increased in intensity until it felt like every molecule in my body exploded. After this I experienced total euphoria. It was my understanding that this procedure was necessary to change my physical configuration to accommodate either the great speed we were traveling or to exist in a similar physical reality, but a different dimension as these entities. I was told I could not remain in this state for a long period of time without damage to my physical self, therefore, the procedures would be done very quickly with very little communication. The procedures are fairly typical of what I've read in other abductees' accounts so I won't elaborate on them here.

My next memory was of waking up in my bed the next morning. On arising, I visited my pet canary whose cage rested on a desk in our living room. To my sorrow the little fellow had died during the night. As with most children, I had (and still do) a strong connection to animals and felt a loss. My mother, in her care, took me out shopping to cheer me up and bought me a pair of tennis shoes. After arriving home, my excitement in getting my new shoes on and getting outside overtook me, and I forgot about the death of my pet. I took off running and on my way out of the house, I passed the laundry room where my canary's cage was sitting on top of the washing machine. I stopped for a long time just to look at the bird and feel the perplexity of its death. I continued on outside, but my heart wasn't into playing or enjoying my new tennis shoes. Before long I was back home.

The first thing I noticed after returning to the laundry room was that the bird cage door was open. Then I froze. Standing beside the washing machine was this very dark gray bird-like being with large black slanting eyes and an enormous head. I felt I was seeing something I shouldn't have. I didn't move for fear he would see me there. This being was holding the bird in his hands and was studying it very intently. He passed the bird from hand to hand while studying the small creature. I was wrong in assuming the being didn't notice me standing there watching him. He was quite aware of my presence and it was something he wanted me to be a part of. The being turned his head toward me and we made eye contact. Immediately upon making eye contact with the Grey my entire being was flooded with a terrible grief and a feeling of a great loss and extreme pain. I was completely overwhelmed by the intensity of these feelings and prior to that moment, had never experienced anything like it. I experienced his thoughts and feelings. I shared his knowledge. Everything became crystal clear.

As suddenly as this occurred, it was over. I felt completely drained both emotionally and physically. I felt a strong sorrow or compassion toward the dark Grey and responded to him by putting my hands around his upper arm as a form of comfort. I immediately felt a kind of flutter in my hands and a ball of light appeared in his place. It rose up to the ceiling and moved up over my head making a whirling, humming sound. It then flashed out and the being was gone.

I walked from the laundry room into our house and thought about everything that had happened. As a result of the prior night's visitation, the Grey had inadvertently caused the death of my canary. Death wasn't the issue. It was causing the death of a being or life form prior to its particular choosing or time. The tragedy was in his interfering in the choice and purpose of this canary's life.

After all of these years I'm still recalling information that was given to me on that day. With each level of awareness or development I achieve, some concept is released into my conscious mind and I will return to the events of that day so long ago. The being said that all life was the same, it was just how it chose to express itself in a physical reality that was different. The love and commitment to all life I sensed from this being was overwhelming.

I consider myself a whole and joyous person. I am fortunate that I have not been traumatized by my experiences like so many other people have. I do not regret my involvement in this phenomenon, but it does come with a price. The experience I shared with you transformed me. Realizing that all life was conscious had a tremendous effect on me. Being a child, I took this experience and its lesson to heart. Because I was not fully equipped to handle this experience, I distorted its message. I put all life in human terms. It became upsetting to me when my father would mow the lawn or pull weeds. I thought he was cruel to hurt life in that way. If I was outside playing and would happen to do something naughty, I was concerned somehow that the trees would tattle on me. It became so problematic to me that I simply remained in the house. The little girl who loved the great outdoors became a serious homebody. The world became a confusing place and I wasn't able to connect with reality. It has been a continuing process for me, and I'd venture to say it is similar for many abductees.

This is one experience of many that I have had, and I am one abductee of many. I'm a lucky one. It is difficult for me to imagine all the people who are rattling around out there confused and distracted by something they can't put their finger on. It is my hope that those people will be reached and will find the tools to make themselves whole again. I am optimistic that one day we will move through the fear to a greater understanding of ourselves and collectively realize our connection to all life.

by Doreen Imper, ©1995

Doreen is also an artist and some of her illustrations can be found in Katharina Wilson's new on-line book, I Forgot What I Wasn't Supposed To Remember...