I Forgot what I Wasn’t Supposed to Remember

By Katharina Wilson

Reviewed by John S. Carpenter, M.S.W., L.C.S.W. 

Abduction by alien beings is hard enough for present day society to digest. In fact, many still doubt UFOs fly through our skies on a daily basis.  We don’t wish to believe in things unsettling, inexplicable, or beyond our control.  Many who see strange things or have unexplained experiences just tuck them away - odd "quirks" or "weird" events.  We then repress, or simply forget them as a matter of convenience.

I am amazed. . .

As a psychiatric therapist, people often tell me about unusual events they don’t dare tell anyone else - for fear they will be seen as crazy.  I am amazed at how many people have supernatural experiences - encounters with ghosts, near-death experiences, psychic phenomena, and UFO/alien incidents.  They know they are not crazy, but they also know they live in a world close-minded and judgmental about such topics.

We must first accept that UFO abductions and encounters with non-human beings are real.  Given that, we must then be willing to believe encounters with such beings are not a simple matter.  As a researcher, I wish the encounters were simple.  I would like collected data to fit neatly into boxes that make logical sense and enable us to predict the nature and purpose of these encounters.  However, as a careful researcher I have learned not to throw out data I didn’t like - but rather, keep it off to the side in a category of miscellaneous, I don’t know what to think about this data. 

Other researchers admit to this same pile of unusual, "non-fitting" data they would rather not discuss publicly.  Yet, the "out-of-the-box" data keeps turning up and developing patterns of its own, whether we like it or not!

A painfully wonderful reminder

Wouldn’t it be easier if alien abductions were just a scientific program being run by little Gray beings to produce hybrids and ensure the survival of their race?  The latest book by Katharina Wilson, I Forgot what I Wasn’t Supposed to Remember, is a painfully wonderful reminder that the experience of dealing with non-human beings is complex and many layers deep.

Her honest, candid, sincere effort to objectively comprehend her own experiences is to be highly praised and admired.  It is not easy to share such confusing experiences as Katharina’s without fearing others will laugh, ridicule, or mock you.  But she is dedicated to helping us all comprehend what is happening to this planet.  Katharina readily admits her alien abduction experiences are confusing and complex; yet, her bold determination to help others and teach with her carefully documented journal entries and intelligent discussions is greatly appreciated.

Delusional?

Others in my field of psychology might conclude Katharina is simply delusional, fantasy-prone, or confabulating from dream material.  However, fantasies usually go in the direction we wish them to go, to delight or to entertain ourselves.  Not Katharina’s "fantasies." Hers are often sad, angry, discouraged, or upset.

Delusions are created by the mind to escape present reality. A creative belief system explains everything and excuses certain behaviors.  If Katharina is delusional, her delusions serve no coping function or productive resolution in her life.  In fact, Katharina is skeptical, and has subjected herself to many psychology tests and medical exams - looking for logical explanations! 

People with delusions tend to have an answer for everything; their minds create what they need.  By contrast, Katharina comes away puzzled, bewildered, perplexed, and determined to keep seeking the truth. She feels she does not have all the answers.

Unwittingly entangled

Having met Katharina personally, I was impressed by how normal she seemed - bright, articulate, grounded, sensible, fun-loving, caring, open-minded.  Like so many abductees I have known or worked with, she is a solid person with a good mind who finds herself unwillingly entangled in this bizarre and confusing phenomenon.  Furthermore, if Katharina was delusional or simply prone to fantasy, then little to none of her reported information would match other reports.  But…it does!!

Strange beings, alien to our everyday life, are interacting with humans on this planet.  We learned first to accept that little Gray beings were landing in UFOs, encountering humans, eventually abducting them.  Then we heard of Tall Blondes, Reptilians, and Praying Mantis types.  It was a stretch to imagine six-foot tall insects leading an extraterrestrial expedition! 

Despite my dislike for such an idea and its certain invitation to laughter and derision, the reports of such beings keep showing up - even in candid, private accounts from as far away as Australia.  Researchers thought perhaps these were "screen memories" - images created by the Grays to distract, intrigue, or confuse abductees.  But these reports are consistent, persistent, and steadily being collected worldwide.

Is this possible?

Katharina describes tan-skinned, bluish-skinned, mottled, wrinkled, and pudgy beings - even ones with red hair, striped faces, and other unusual features.  Is this possible?  After all, what is too weird?  The bigger question - Are we ready to accept even more yet?

In my research I have collected details on nearly all the beings she describes - always wondering if anybody else had encountered these very different beings.

How would you describe a "typical human being" to an alien?  We have dwarves, midgets, seven-footers, very thin to very obese humans. They have blonde, black, brown, red, white, orange, and gray hair of many shades and textures.  Abduct a few teenagers, and add red, green, blue, and purple hair as well!  We have hundreds of hair styles, not to mention shaved and bald heads.  Humans are stocky, pudgy, frail, muscular, wimpy, or well-built.  We even have albinos!  Skin colors include white, pink, tanned, brown, black, and yellowish.  So what is a "typical" human? 

It just isn’t simple

We would like to keep it simple, easy, and less confusing.  But that has just not been the case with non-human entities.  Accounts of non-human beings similar to Katharina’s are in my files, and their mood, attitude, or behavior is similar.  As Katharina has described, the Blonde is usually tall, a well-built being with flowing hair, nice features, and piercing blue eyes.  Communication is telepathic. Abductees often feel a benevolent, warm, caring presence.  Some have felt the Blondes are protective, "like guardian angels."

My research also contains about four types of Grays - as Katharina has described - who are short, medium, or tall and gray, white, or tan.  Other unusual beings have popped up in my data matching some of her descriptions.

Along with Budd Hopkins, Dave Jacobs, and many others, Katharina believes the beings are creating hybrids through a breeding program.  And she agrees hybrids may be mingling undetected with our human population.

Len Stringfield said. . .

Military involvement is a fact in UFO crash-retrieval research.  The late Leonard Stringfield told with me in private that some 635 military personnel had revealed to him confidentially they had witnessed or otherwise been involved with 30 UFO crashes, encounters, and alien body incidents.  Ryan S. Wood documents at least 74 crashes worldwide in his book, MAJIC Eyes Only. But why would the military abduct humans and interrogate them (often with drugs) regarding aliens?

Researcher Linda Moulton Howe told me years ago that crashed saucers and dead bodies don’t answer many questions, but from abductees something can be learned about alien agendas, practices, procedures, and intent.  I was intrigued when several of my abduction cases unexpectedly talked about "abduction by military" encounters.  It was a surprise to me and the subjects as well.

Fuzzy memories

I worked with Leah Haley - without a doubt one of the most famous cases in which governmental agencies were involved - and the events happened as I worked with her!   Fuzzy memories of drug injections, interrogation rooms, experiments, and certain military personnel were clearly in Leah’s experiences.  Reading about Katharina’s recollections was amazingly similar.  And from a psychological perspective it is interesting neither Leah nor Katharina can explain or fully recall these military encounters.

If this were delusional or fantasy-based, both would have had unique explanations or detailed conclusions. Instead, they are bewildered, uncertain, and angry that this might happen.  Even if this were some elaborate screen memory employed by the beings, the details correlate, suggesting that whoever is responsible is performing the same types of procedures.

Images of catastrophe

Katharina succeeds at presenting her experiences straightforwardly, without conclusions or judgments.  She may present her own ideas, theories, or intelligent opinions, but she always allows the reader to derive his own conclusions.

At the end of her book of journal entries she presents a strong impression of what the future may hold for all of us.  Though emotionally-charged and offered as the driving motivation for publishing these experiences, her recall of imagery of an alien war or world devastation is not unlike images shown to some of my own research subjects.

 One abductee described a three-dimensional image of the Earth disintegrating in a glowing blast.  Another was shown images of poverty and suffering after a worldwide war with alien entities.  Yet another abductee described much warlike activity with an exodus in spacecrafts for a number of people.  In all these cases it seemed these were images of what could happen if humans do not alter their present behavior.  These abductees were moved by what they were shown and the vivid imagery remained memorable for years. 

Only triggers more questions

In conclusion, Katharina offers us much to consider as an "advanced look" at the phenomenon of encounters with non-human beings.  I thank her for sharing her details, thoughts, painful moments, so others may benefit and learn.  It is a clear reminder of the great complexity of these confusing encounters, the extent of military interventions, and the many further questions raised - whether we like it or not.  As one researcher told me years ago, "Dealing with alien encounters is like walking into a maze of mirrors with a quicksand floor."  It is an endless labyrinth of complex, confusing experiences, which only triggers more questions.

This book review was originally published in the Journal of Abduction Encounter Research, 3^rd Quarter, 2007. http://www.jarmag.com

John S. Carpenter, M.S.W., L.C.S.W.

John Carpenter obtained a Bachelors of Arts degree in Psychology from DePauw University, Greencastle, Indiana, and a master’s degree in Social Work, from Washington University, St. Louis, Missouri. He has had advanced training in Clinical Hypnosis in order to practice as a psychiatric therapist and hypnotherapist in Branson, Missouri. For nearly 20 years he has counseled people in Southwest Missouri for every kind of emotional problem imaginable.

His life-long curiosity in UFOs led to his volunteering his services for over 120 cases of possible UFO abduction. Using clever interviewing and thorough hypnotic investigation, he has collected amazing patterns of data which clearly depict a consistent and coherent scenario of extraterrestrial contact. He presented six papers at the prestigious MIT Abduction Study Conference in Boston in 1992. His published papers have brought him international recognition and speaking invitations on five continents. He has presented at conferences from Australia to England, on national and international radio, television, and film documentaries. He has created and produced seven research videotapes since 1996. Mr. Carpenter also serves as MUFON’s Director of Abduction Research and is a founding member of JAR: Journal For Abduction Encounter Research.

carpenter2655@aol.com